What If

Do you have any regrets in life? 
Is there anything you wish you could do over?  
How do you feel about those things today?
 
I know I’ve had many things over the course of my life – on different occasions – that I have said … if only!  

  • If only I’d listened to my gut instincts, I would never have made that mistake.  
  • If only I’d said no thank you to a job I really didn’t like, I wouldn’t have got stuck in the day to day grind.  
  • If only I’d asked my sisters and friends opinion, I could’ve gained a greater perspective and not dimmed and extinguished my light in several situations. 
  • If only I’d left that relationship as soon as I knew it wasn’t healthy for me, I would have suffered less.
  • If only I’d researched that information myself, I would’ve found the Truth sooner and not lost all that time, money and energy.
  • If only I’d listened to the pain in my body earlier in life, I wouldn’t have these body pains or aches, etc.

 
There are so many things for so many of us as we look back over the ups and downs of our lives – that in hindsight – we’d change or think we’d change.
 
I wonder though, what if.

  • What if, that awful job you took, taught you about discipline, commitment and organizing skills;
  • What if, that ill-advised relationship taught you about who you really are and what you are worth;
  • What if, that friend who lied to you and betrayed your trust, taught you to find your voice and set healthier boundaries in all your relationships;
  • What if, that wrong turn you took while driving, gave you a chance to slow down and look around you – to pause even momentarily;
  • What if the experiences, situations and circumstances you have had were the best choices you could make while finding your way to something more expansive

As I mature and ponder some of the bigger choices and decisions I’ve made over the years, I find I’m much more compassionate and kinder to myself as I unravel the layers.  I’m able to go into the feel of things and ask myself why or why not and then listen.  I then can begin to shift into a ‘what if’ I needed that experience to heal another part of myself.

I don’t always find the straight forward answers, but at least I can soften into the potential of something different to consider.
 
To me, the ‘if only’ comments come with so much regret.  If I can shift my perception, while acknowledging and feeling the experience, it may offer me a chance to say ‘what if’ instead of ‘if only’. 
 
I’d be interested in hearing your thoughts and feelings about the ‘what ifs’ in your life.