Breaking Old Patterns

We all have them – old patterns – old ways of doing things – things that put us on an ‘auto pilot’ in our reactions. So many things are done without awareness – we continue with these old, established patterns without truly knowing if they continue to benefit us, our lives or our families.

Patterns are designs in life that have elements that repeat in a predictable manner. 

In this life, we are meant to evolve, meant to lean into becoming our best selves. To allow this process, we must learn from our stories, experiences, and ways of being. We can also learn from our mistakes and challenges if we take the time to review the situation and how it affected our lives.

Mindfulness is such an important piece. We need to slow down, pay attention to what we do, when we do it, and what circumstances or people elicit a reaction from us. 

This is a process of continual cycles. For me, the trick is to recognize when I’ve gone into ‘auto pilot’ and I’m not necessarily in the moment with the circumstance in front of me. 

Each situation, circumstance, relationship and event is a chance for us to change an old pattern. We can break old unhealthy, non useful patterns or enhance those patterns that are working in our lives. But, to effect a conscious change, we must bring ourselves to the moment – to the opportunity – in order to be open to the lesson, lean in and guide the change. 

Some of the patterns that we embody are simply ways we have learned to survive in life, others are devised from our minds (based on our experiences of the past). These patterns have brought us to this moment – have allowed us to traverse this life and land right here. As conscious Beings, part of our work is to kindly, intentionally and without judgment, look at our words, behaviours and automatic reactions to life. In this exploration, we are to discern which actions suit us, our lives and our Truth so that we can enhance those areas while making a better choice to respond in others.

In the overall scheme of things, we want to move inward and dissect our intentions, as we uncover Truth and get to know ourselves better.  Each pattern gives us information. Each action and reaction gives us more information. In discerning and deciding, we need to come home to our Hearts and be true to ourselves in all our conversations, interactions and responses.

For example, remember a time you reacted to something or someone in less than a loving way. Pause, try to recall what triggered you – a phrase, a word, a behaviour, a mannerism, what? Can you remember how you felt? Do you know why you felt that way? Is there a connection to earlier life? Did you feel disempowered; disrespected; unloved; ignored? What was your emotional hook? When you allow yourself to inquire and look without judging – you may uncover a knee-jerk reaction of protection that you have mastered over your life. This is a great thing to become aware of as you heal and grow. The more you can bring awareness to your actions, the more authentic they can become.

What patterns do you carry? Perhaps from early childhood? Are you willing to look intently and slow down your responses? Are you ready to heal that piece? Are you willing to love yourself through it all and know that you are enough, and deserve love, respect, and kindness? It is a process. It is a journey.

Breathe and become more present to your life as you heal old patterns and create new healthy ones.